Don't Let Me Play Doomfist

Doomfist is the most agonizing hero I’ve ever tried. I’ve accepted that I’m not a very good Overwatch player, but I’m passable. Accepting that I wasn’t good enough to carry with McCree or Sombra, I pretty much play rank or support in every game. My goal is to keep the idiots around me from dying over and over and running around like headless chickens. When I play Reinhardt, I’m just a school crossing guard for a bunch of 12-year-olds located somewhere in the Midwest. Doomfist doesn’t allow you to protect, only to punch.

There’s nothing about Doomfist that fits my playstyle. I’ve always been horrible in fighting games, from ARMS to Street Fighter. It took a long time and years of self-infliction brought on by watching EVO highlights on YouTube that I will never be good at fighters. Whenever I go over to my buddy’s crib, I’ll humor him with a few games of Injustice 2 or Tekken 7, but I almost always lose. Button mashing, or pressing every plastic knob on the controller as fast as possible isn’t a good strategy when you’re trying to win. The competitive nature inside my heart fizzles out when I play, choosing to just get my ass whooped by someone who just “beat a professional video game player.”

The last Overwatch hero released before Clubber Lang was Orisa, who I immediately fell in love with. She had a shield that could keep my allies safe (or at least a Torbjorn turret) and took less damage as a walking meat shield. I’ve been loving the quadruped from Numbani and when I heard we were getting the long fabled Doomfist, I couldn’t have been more excited. I’m obsessed with the lore behind the game, following every clue hidden in a trailer in pursuit to be the best fluff bunny. When he came on the PTR and I got my first chance to try him out, I was severely disappointed.

With Overwatch, I’ve actually been able to see some success. Sure, I’ve ended every season in Silver or Gold, but that was still good enough for me to keep on trucking. I play on console and the only FPS I’ve played were the original Mass Effect trilogy – to say I was out of my element was an understatement. But with perseverance and way too much time on my hands, I was able to feel comfortable enough playing my few champions. Doomfist is not one of those.

It took a long time to learn, but I know squishy carries just aren’t for me. Doomfist is the sort of hero that waits until a fight has broken out, then starts punching people in the face with his combo. Of the 20 or so games I’ve played with Doomy on the live servers, I don’t think I actually landed the whole combo correctly once. If I got kills, it was by waiting behind a choke point and punching whoever was dumb enough to walk into my web. A good Doomfist player can dance around the screen like a ballerina, while I moved more like Reinhardt after too many beers.

I’m not the sort of guy that needs to watch Tyler1 videos or main Genji to feel like a “real man.” I don’t need to wield a giant fist and slam people into walls to have a good time, I’d much rather work on my Lucio boops or Reinhardt charges. Maybe one day I’ll become the “edgelord” supreme that every Doomfist main blossoms from, but that day is far away.