I’m a huge Star wars fan and I’m a sucker for all the weird merchandise attached to the series. I’ve got a complete replica of Obi-wan’s lightsaber as an umbrella, complete with all the pointy bits that make holding it for more than a few minutes hurt your hands. I don’t care about the practicality of the product as long as it’s cool and has that branding on it. But recently, I managed to get my hands on a piece of Star Wars merchandising that made me completely change my mind.
Star Wars Death Star Bluetooth Floating Speakers by PLOX Innovations is exactly what it sounds like. For $179, you can own the machine that blew up Alderaan and have it levitate right on your desk. PLOX sent me a Death Star speaker to review and I’ve been using it as much as possible for the last month or so. Here are my impressions, but here’s the TL;DR: don’t buy the thing if you need a good speaker, buy it because you are obsessed with Star Wars.
Star Wars Death Star Bluetooth Floating Speakers
It Could Sound Better- Let’s get this out of the way first: these speakers don’t sound very good. There’s nearly no bass, everything you play sounds muffled and there’s no way to fix it. I recently bought a $200 Bose SoundTouch 10 that is a much better speaker in nearly every facet. I’d still choose to play the Imperial March from my Death Star, though.
Battery Life Is Superb- During my testing, the Death Star lasted around five to six hours before its battery died. Having to take the monster off its cradle to recharge it every few hours would be annoying, so I’m glad it can hold a charge.
Bluetooth Works- I could walk around my apartment, phone in my pocket, without the Death Star disconnecting. I’ve had to deal with electronics with Bluetooth that barely make it ten feet, so I’m glad it can make the full 33 feet. That makes my apartment feel really small.
There Is Floating, But Not Very High- Just look at the box and then look at the actual Death Star. Notice something different? The box shows the orb of doom floating at least three inches off the platform, while in real life the thing barely makes it an inch. I know the floating is still just a gimmick, but it would be a much cooler gimmick with just those few extra inches.
Magnets, How Do They Work? - The big selling point of the Death Star is its ability to levitate and play music. In order to put the Death Star on it’s base, the pad needs to be plugged into the wall and the speaker placed directly in the middle using a plastic funnel. Getting it down in the middle takes practice and you will mess it up plenty of times before getting it right. If it doesn’t, it slams down on the bottom and can potentially scratch the base.
Don’t Touch That- Once you finally get it on the base, it starts to float. If you have a cat or anyone with curious fingers, make sure your Death Star is hidden far away. One tap and the thing falls off it’s magnetic axis and scratches the base. It’s not a toy, don’t have it lying around when you go to Tosche Station to pick up some power converters.
Overall, it’s a cool conversation starter that really rich people wouldn’t mind having in their homes. If you want a good speaker, this is not your purchase. If you want a way to play the soundtrack to Episode One while you eat your Darth Vader shaped toast in your Wookie onesie, then this might be for you.
