Do you ever just think to yourself, ‘Hm, I would love to have a tiny, childish, hyper-sexualized, waifu living locked in a glass cage on my bedside table?’ If you’re one of the many that answered ‘duh,’ to that, then Gatebox is for you.
Gatebox is the newest entry into the Virtual Home Assistant market after Amazon Echo, and Google Home. But Gatebox has something its rivals are missing – ‘Azuma Hikari,’ a tiny virtual woman built to ease the pangs of your lonely lifestyle. Described as “a comforting character that is great to those living alone, [Hikari] will always do all she can just for the owner.”
As you spend time with your caged wife, she will learn your habits and help keep your schedule. Turn the lights on for you before you come home so you don’t have to enter into the crushing darkness of your loneliness. But what happens when you’re away and start to miss your companion? Gatebox also has a texting application so you can communicate with her from anywhere.
Pre-orders have opened on the company’s website and unfortunately marital bliss doesn’t come cheap. Expect to pay over $2000 if you want one of the first 300 models. If you’re still not sold, please watch the video below and learn how Gatebox can change your life. No seriously, please watch the below video. You will not regret it.
