Like an accomplice to a crime whose account of the events keeps changing, George Lucas has once again altered our understanding of the “Star Wars” sequel trilogy saga. In a new profile piece in USA Today, George Lucas now claims his plans were to produce the “Star Wars” sequel trilogy all along, despite stating in a 2008 interview “There will definitely be no Episodes VII-IX.” It was previously revealed that Lucas had been considering a return to the “Star Wars” series, but the new claims are our best look yet into an apocalyptic, hellscape parallel Earth where the George Lucas-directed “Star Wars: Episode 7 The Dumbest Possible Movie” is mere months away from theaters.

Can you picture this “Star Wars 7: The Force Awakens” teaser trailer if the next “Star Wars” was yet another George Lucas entry?

“Star Wars: Episode 7 The Force Awakens” Teaser Trailer

Somewhere in the multiverse people just like us are facing this exact fate:

With the “Star Wars” franchise out of George Lucas’ hands, we will never get to see his version of “Star Wars 7: The Force Awakens,” forcing him to invent brand new franchises to destroy (though he’s only credited with the “Strange Magic” story):

The New “Star Wars”?

Pity is due to that alternate universe where George Lucas still determines the fate of “Star Wars,” but the knowledge of this poor world’s existence that can help us count our own blessings. Sure “Star Wars: Episode 7 The Force Awakens” is still nearly a year away from its Dec. 18 theatrical release, but for the first time since May 19, 1999, the release date for “Star Wars: Episode 1 The Phantom Menace,” there is hope for the future of “Star Wars.”

“Star Wars” in the Lucas Claws

In contrast to that terrifying, alternate universe George Lucas, we are blessed with a man who salvageably destroyed his own best work. It’s a win-win scenario, where we get a “Star Wars” sequel trilogy that isn’t guaranteed to be terrible, and George Lucas gets what he wants:

“The only thing I really regret about Star Wars is the fact I never got to see it — I never got to be blown out of my seat when the ship came over the screen. The next one, I’ll be able to enjoy it like anybody else.”

This is a good world… one where George Lucas will never be allowed to touch “Star Wars” again. Truly, we are blessed.