Rumors have been circulating for the past few days suggesting Darth Vader will make an appearance in the upcoming Han Solo standalone film, following a statement released from the organizers of Fandomfest Comic-Con in response to the absence of 6’7 goliath, Spencer Wilding. Though to exactly what capacity we see Vader is unknown, this goes a long way to legitimize many of my fears regarding the kind of toothless big budget fan film this movie is quickly shaping up to be.
The Star Wars universe is supposed to feel big. Shoehorning lightsabers and TIE fighters into every goddamn release is only counterintuitive. Lando and Chewie making a return makes sense, though I’d rather not be subjected to a cutesy scene cueing audiences in on the first time Han and his iconic co-pilot met, but that’s sorta the point of these things – a feature-length license to poke audiences in their “‘'Member?” holes. I personally prefer not knowing how such an odd pairing came to be, as I feel it adds some mythic weight to it. Same goes for Lando, except maybe less so, given that his friendship with Han is only glossed over in Empire. Lando's decision to go out of his way to rescue Han in Jedi could stand to gain from a little more back history. Vader, though? No way, dude.
I, like most, thought Rogue One was a fine film, but I seemed to be in the minority when it came to the command ship scene (the one where Vader merced a bunch of rebels with one hand and patted all you man-children on the back with the other). It’s a cynical gainsay of everything we understand about the character, the continuity of the films, and the narrative flow of the story it ends. The Darth Vader established in the original films is not a “badass,” but an enforcer. He’s utilized both sparingly and strategically to maintain his menacing aura. More importantly, way to undermine the heroic sacrifice of your film’s protagonists by having the ending showcase the “siiic” moves of the mascot of the opposing team. These movies keep forgetting that Vader should not be an icon in their world just because he is one in ours. To the world of Star Wars, Vader should just be another evil weirdo in a cape amidst a sea of other evil weirdos in capes.
Han Solo is essentially a space pirate. Are you telling me there isn’t a ton of cool shit to have a SPACE PIRATE get into that doesn’t involve Darth Vader?! The only way to validate the existence of a Han Solo standalone film is to fill it with as many singular ideas as possible. I mean that’s the idea of these standalone anthology films, right? Aren’t they supposed to be movies set in the Star Wars universe that don’t rely on the overarching tropes and themes for you to be able to enjoy them? I want to leave the theatre with the sense that the filmmakers had an interesting story to tell, not just an intellectual property to cash in on.
I want to see new ships, new planets and new weapons. I don’t want to see the Baby Looney Tunes equivalent of The Star Wars Universe. That means no baby Leia with little baby hair buns, no C3PO or R2D2, no Ponda Baba (with both arms pre-Mos Eisley Cantina incident), no scene that shows where and how Han got his white shirt or his blaster, and for fuck’s sake, NO DARTH VADER. Kickass smuggler has to smuggle a thing from a thing in space. It writes itself.
